I want you to know that the War on Some Drugs has caught up with me. I need letters of character in a plea for leniency that I can show to my judge as well as correspondence while in prison. I am charged with conspiracy to distribute ecstasy and I have already pleaded guilty.

Some of the people that I have had smoked pot or done other drugs with are quite well known. Since the following people are dead, I can reveal their names.

Karl Hess — chief speechwriter for GOP presidential candidate Barry Goldwater and ghostwriter for Nixon, Ford and not to be redundant, a mafia crime figure. He wrote the 1960 Republican Party Platform. After becoming a tax resister in the 60's he gave seminars at the Institute for Policy Studies and was an emcee at Black Panther rallies. Karl was the subject of a documentary that won an academy award. I have a video of him with Robert Anton Wilson, famed science fiction writer and stand up philosopher that was made at the 1987 Libertarian Party convention, which I organized and is available for $30.

Timothy Leary — famed former Harvard professor and soft ware designer. While known for his advocacy of LSD he also wrote the first paper on group therapy and devised the Leary Personality Test, which was administered on him while in prison to determine what kind of prison he should be assigned to. I produced an event with Leary and Wilson called "From Psychedelics to Cyberspace" that introduced virtual reality to NYC in 1990. This sellout event attracted over 1300 people as well as coverage of over 50 media outlets including WABC-TV and WNEW-TV stations and got a front-page story in The NY Times I have a video of this for $30.

Terrance McKenna — Author of "Archaic Revival" which postulates that psychedelic mushrooms were the first domesticated plant and that since psilocybin improves nighttime visual acuity helped human evolution and that this is the reason that these receptor sites are in the body. He also founded a botanical preserve of plants used in shamanic preparations used all over the world.

Spalding Gray — actor in almost 40 films including "The Killing Fields", his famous monologue "Swimming to Cambodia" is based on his experiences in that film, a history of the genocide done by Pol Pot and his receiving aid from the U.S. Spalding also freely admits of his use of psychedelics. Recently the New York Times had a full page of articles on him calling him the greatest monologist of our time. He was also a cover story in New York magazine.

Allen Ginsberg — poet laureate of the 60's and author of "Howl and "Kaddish". He led Buddhist chants at peace rallies to help mediate (meditate?) an end to the Vietnamese conflict. He was known for bringing the war "om". I met him at a fund-raising party and told him I admired his poetry. "Will you give me a blow job?" he queried. I was taken aback rather than take in the back. Poetry for Allen was a sound way of receiving oral gratification in one sense or another. Alienated entertainers of the time developed their talent in a selfish though honest search for a groupie to get into.

Andrew Kopkind — New Left writer and editor of May Day and Hard Times. He taped a talk of mine on spying and printed it in his media. That was nice since I never taped or spied on him.

Walter Breen — was the husband and researcher for best-selling author Marion Zimmer Bradley. He was an accomplished author in his own write on humor, ancient Greece, classical music and the occult. His annual encyclopedia on American numismatics made him the leading authority. He agreed with my theory that each rise of statism in America was marked by the physical and image debasement of its coinage. Gold and silver, noble metals were replaced by base metals in 1933 and 1965. Base presidents in the half dollar in 1946, the quarter in 1932 and the nickel in 1914 replaced the Goddess Liberty. The Native American was replaced on the penny in 1909 and the God Mercury in 1946. All of these dates were epochal times. 1909-1914 marked the passing of the Federal Reserve Act and the Income Tax. 1932-1933 was the beginnings of Roosevelt's bungling and 1946 marked his enshrinement. 1965 was the great society and the Vietnam debacle. It is important to know the coin of the realm if you want to make change, or else how can you reach all quarters? Walter and I attended a psychedelics conference together.

Abbie Hoffman — I confronted him about his cocaine dealing at his coming out from hiding party saying that he brought dishonor to all of us who counseled people to stay away from hard drugs in so that we could show the public the distinction between the relative harmlessness of the marijuana culture vs. the deadly, paranoid cocaine culture.

Jerry Rubin — author of "Growing up at 37" and former partner of the political/comedic Abbie Hoffmann who he debated at Yippee vs. Yuppie debates. I met Jerry at one of his famous networking parties (there were 3000 people attending) when he was a stockbroker. I told him about the legal, smart and life extension drugs designed by Durk Pearson and Sandy Shaw. Former Yippie ended up working for former YAFers Durk and Sandy as salesperson for his products.

Steve Donaldson — former Goldwater activist, Navy vet and noted pre-stonewall gay activist and head of Stop Prison Rape. He was the subject of a documentary on this subject on 60 Minutes. While in prison he was raped as much as 50 times in one night and yet never had any hatred for those responsible. A true saint with a punkish sense of humor. It was an honor to give him marijuana while he was in the last stages of AIDS, which he got while raped in prison.

Ron Crickenberger — former political director of the Libertarian Party. He was once for raising arrested for possession of marijuana and in protests against the drug war. He was greatly responsible for raising money and generating ads that defeated pro drug war congressmen.

Remember these are only the dead ones. I also smoked pot with three people who wrote speeches for Ronald Reagan. There was congressman Dana Rohrabacher who has admitted that he "drank the bong water" and he has submitted medical marijuana bills. There was also Ron Kimberling who actually authored a libertarian position paper calling for an end to the drug war and later ended up as assistant secretary of education and later as executive director of the Ronald Reagan Foundation, which administers the Reagan Presidential Library. Another future GOP leader was Shawn Steele, who later became the chair of the California Republican Party. All of these were members of our libertarian caucus of Young Americans for Freedom. It is a truism of that time that a conservative who smoked pot soon became a libertarian. It is also a fact that many of us who did LSD evolved into anarchists. (More on this in the book "A Generation Divided" by Rebecca Klatch, professor at SDSU) Maybe this is the real reason for Reagan's war on drugs and why I joined the opposition. Lately, I have become disenchanted with many drug users because what is the use of using substances if little of substance comes from the many using it? By no longer dealing, I am now dealing with it.

I started as a Goldwater activist when I was 13 and attended Ayn Rand lectures 2 years later. At 19 as a member of Young Americans for Freedom, I submitted the idea of having a panel at a YAF regional convention showing the conservative spectrum. It was composed of these noteworthy people: Henry Paolucci, former Conservative Party candidate for senator as the traditionalist, Frank S Meyer, ex-communist writer for National Review who invented conservatism as a fusion of traditionalism and libertarianism, Jerome Tuccille, an objectivist then, and Karl Hess who in his then recent article "The Death of Politics" in Playboy took the view of libertarianism as being closer to the New Left than conservatism. The contrasting debate made an impression on many and me who became libertarians. Jerry writes about this pivotal panel in his book "It Usually Starts with Ayn Rand". It was here that I first met Karl and Murray Rothbard who is known as the Karl Marx of Libertarianism. It was here that the leaders of the libertarians of the East and West coasts of YAF first met to plan to organize a libertarian caucus.

Later I met with Karl and his son to form an anarchist caucus within YAF, which we formed to anchor the new libertarians to a consistent position. I helped author a resolution for YAF to support draft resistance. While YAF did support abolition of the draft, draft resistance was especially unpopular with the funders of YAF. YAF was not only a training ground for future conservative leaders it also pushed for YAF to fight the New Left. As well as support the war in Vietnam. These were extremely unpopular positions on campus.

The time of the 60's were similar to the current crisis; an unpopular war abroad, an unpopular drug war at home, widespread government spying on its citizens, a GOP president mired in scandal who repudiated the conservative ideal of limited government and the ensuing damage economy. The campuses were in turmoil and rallies of 500,000 were mounted to oppose the war in several cities. Add in the civil rights struggles, the rise of rock music, the sexual revolution, the adolescence the baby boomers and the cultural ferment fueled by marijuana and psychedelics and you could understand the crucible of the times that radicalized us.

To be radicalized means to go to the root of your beliefs. Libertarianism at this stage meant opposition to the warfare state as well as the welfare state and opposition to victimless crime laws. As classical liberals, we once lost to the socialists because we did not believe that a radical analysis of the system was necessary. The next stage was the acceptance of civil disobedience as a tactic. This question was dramatically faced at the 1969 YAF convention.

It was going to be an amazing weekend. The 1969 YAF convention and the World Science Fiction Convention were going to be in St. Louis, Missouri. As the anarchist caucus could not arrange to use the hotel facilities we arranged to meet at the Arch. The soaring 600ft. tall arch is part of The Jefferson National Park and is St. Louis most famous landmark. There Karl Hess, the most charismatic figure in the libertarian movement gave a discourse that is remembered to this day. He walked among the crowd of libertarians and conservatives, all of whom were inspired by the words that he wrote for Barry Goldwater. He was characteristically warm, spoke simply and wisely and most important never got angry or talked down to people. His main point was that where government expands, liberty contracts whether it is the welfare state or the warfare state.

After the talk I got another clue of how magickal this beginning was. Everyone was making puns. It was an archive of anarchistic arch-conservatives having over-arching concern for our arch-enemies; the archaic architects of panarchy. Goddess is alive, magick is afoot. If it's not a foot at least it's an arch with soul. It is part of a widely held pagan philosophy that puns and coincidences are a sign of magickal presence (pre-sense).

Even the conservatives got into punning. While some libertarians shouted out the slogan "laissez-faire"; the conservatives responded "lazy-fairy". The first word was probably a comment on easy being a libertarian and how hard it was being a conservative. The second word was likely a reference to the proposed alliance with the New Left and that it was an unnatural act. We responded that it was a civil union even though the conservatives thought it was a same sects marriage. We also had a gesture of one finger upraised (no, not that finger, the forefinger). This finger meant I or individualism and meant we were not afraid of standing up (erect?) for our beliefs. The conservatives said that in order to show the true shade of our beliefs we should show the pinky. This was rather small of them. In this finger food for thought we presaged the digital revolution.

At the convention, libertarians were losing credential battles and being purged from positions due to the machinations of David Keene, who is now head of the American Conservative Union. I knew that our positions were not ever going to be accepted much less adopted within YAF. There was a strong need to show the contrast between libertarians and traditionalists as well as to coalesce our band and strike out on our own. What was needed was ceremonial magick that would incorporate the America's goddess symbol with the trademark of the radical sixties. Something dramatic needed to happen and I approached David Schumacher, then a Princeton student and now rancher, executive and a member of the Eris Society (Eris is the goddess of discord). I then obtained a Xerox copy of a draft card from Durk Pearson, now a famed researcher and author on life extension and a lighter from Jarrett Wollstein who is still a renowned libertarian pamphleteer. The moment was the defeat of our draft resistance resolution. Now the symbol of YAF is the Torch of Liberty (from our Goddess of the NYC harbor) and then Dave became that symbol by lighting that draft card. The conservatives became outraged and a melee erupted. At that moment, the libertarians realized that we needed to declare our independence from the conservative movement and form our own movement. It is generally accepted that at this exact moment the modern day libertarian movement was born. It is amazing that many libertarians see ceremonial magick as just theatre; it is rather a theatre of the just.

The reason why I did not burn the draft card was that I had pissed off the conservative movement earlier that month by my testimony at the House Internal Security Subcommittee (formerly HUAC). I told the committee that that in the process of investigating Students for a Democratic Society (the main New Left organization of the time) that I had discovered a much more dangerous organization that had destroyed much more property and lives than SDS ever could and that this organization was the United States government. Now the committee was used to handling hostile witnesses before. In fact, radicals were proud of being subpoenaed; they called it subpoenas envy. What really pissed off HUAC was that I was supposed to be a friendly witness.

Yes, I had been spying on SDS during all time I had been organizing libertarians within YAF and the other libertarians knew it. I had decided to become a spy within SDS to learn why SDS had become much more popular than the right. Part of the reason was that they were getting laid more often. After all, if I was going to be a radical for capitalism I had to learn whatever I could about becoming a radical. Giving information to the government, which I later regretted, was a way of covering myself in case I later wished to work within the system.

I had the right costume for the part; granny glasses, long hair, moustache, work shirt and jeans. Instead of the US army surplus field jacket, I wore a West Point tunic jacket that I got from my brother after he graduated from West Point. Some SDSers objected but since I was considered cadre I felt I was entitled. I was called a political transvestite and a multi-party personality. Where did this look come from? Anarchist theorist and Spanish Civil War veteran, Murray Bookchin in his brilliant essay "Listen Marxist" has an interesting theory for this tired attire. Revolutions, like history, tend to copy the one immediately preceding it. The uniform thinking as well as clothing was a faded copy of the union organizing of the 1930's when the left made its greatest Marx on history. Radical students dress this way today, perhaps because of its recycling message. Murray Bookchin once spoke to an LP convention and his presence on the anarchist left is a mirror image of Murray Rothbard on the libertarian movement. He even thundered against the attacks on Western Civilization while maintaining his radicalism just like Rothbard.

I have a different explanation for my fashion statement. Recently there is a show on TV called "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" where gays fashion men into consumerist metrosexuals. What happened to me was that I got in touch with my inner lesbian, disdaining spending too much money and time on clothing and shaving moving me to slob-urbanism rather than the metrosexualism. It's all in the jeans. I guess this makes me a male version of the fag hag. On the other hand, costumes or ceremonial garb can be an art form itself.

In establishing my credibility within SDS I created my own SDS chapter, a collection of white hippies who could not get into college elsewhere. Because I organized it, I was elected head of it. It was a racially mixed, radical community college in Newark NJ, a city which during the previous year had suffered major riots. I helped elect the president of our student body who was a black Muslim draft resister. One assistant to the dean actually tried to have me beaten up by Italian working class youths who later told me of his plan. To further illustrate his cravenness, the dean told me that I could not set up a literature table because no rules for allowing this had been set up. He even told me I could not set up a SDS chapter because no national organizations were allowed on campus, so I set up Students for Peace instead.

As an experiment to see how white working class youth would respond to radical arguments, I arrange for the National Lawyers Guild to address my group on campus. It was loud and passionate, definitely something that was not part of the accepted academic style that would allow students to snooze in peace. One fear that these students had was that if the school was closed or if they were kicked out, it would mean that they could be drafted and sent to Vietnam. This college was also a possible entry into the middle class. Since I came from a blue-collar background myself and with my brother a leiutenant in Vietnam, I could sympathize with their plight even if it were exaggerated. Complaints were made from neighboring classroom instructors and I went to the dean and was told that I was to face a disciplinary hearing. I then told the NLG of this fact, they immediately produced a brief as well as legal representation, and we had a meeting with the dean. My law student advocate asked; "Where was the rule that I had supposedly broken?" "Was I entitled to legal representation?" "Was I entitled to a jury of my peers?" You get the idea. The dean blanched, took me aside and told me that he would drop the charges.

Be careful of political experimentation in crazy times. In the autumn of 1968, the SDS and the Panthers decided to have a rally, guerrilla theatre and march to protest the war and the lack of choice in the upcoming elections. I got together with my friends in YAF and we planned a Buckleyesque genteel theatre critique. Boy, did we underestimate the situation. A bunch of the Italian students from my college joined them and they did not like student radicals. During the march a general melee broke out. At one point five of these aforementioned (rather than YAFformentioned) students tried to attack me. A black student who I had just made friends with a few days before pulled out a knife to defend me. Fortunately at this time, my friends in YAF intervened. There is a photo of two groups of students attacking/defending me while I lay on the ground in a fetal position with my mind screaming, "What am I doing?" The police arrested the black student and I went to his trial and the judge was decent enough to drop the in real charges. There are lessons in life that you do not learn in books.

There was another incident that nudged me in a libertarian direction. One student came to me wearing a US Army jacket and told me he was a Vietnam veteran. "Oh no" I exclaimed. (How was I going to explain myself?") He saw my discomfort and said that many people thought that the returning veterans were pro-war but the truth was quite different. He was in a combat unit that experienced land mines and sniper fire that appeared to come from nearby villages. They would go into these villages and no one would or could tell them who was responsible. Without co-operation from local villagers, a frustrated military unit can easily become oppressive no matter what the original intent was. For this reason I fear the US involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Later the administration tried psychological warfare. At a student leadership conference, we were required to fill out forms that asked us about who we would trust in a crisis etc. so that they could undermine us and divide us. At one point, the school psychologist sat within our discussion circle just to show how intimidated we were by authority. We learned our lesson well and his removal became one of our demands later that spring.

In my role as SDS activist on campus, I did what I thought a conscientious activist would do. Student Power was the expression of the belief that people should have influence on the institutions that shape their lives. After all students were supposedly trying to learn how to participate in democratic society. I was also involved in struggle to protect basic civil liberties like freedom of assembly, press and discussion. As Students for Peace, we confined ourselves in national issues such as opposition to the war, the draft and the marijuana laws. Some SDSers looked down on this because these actions were not oriented to the working class, that it was mere student power and petit bourgeois. These students were from Rutgers and Princeton or other middle and upper class schools. What really pissed me off was the attitude "Well, we created a civil liberties issue but it was good idea anyway". They were apologizing for the very liberties that protected their politics! Fortunately, schMarxists like these are becoming more rare only to be somewhat revived whenever the state gets into another war.

Later a coalition composed of Italian working class youth, hippies and blacks was formed. We discovered that out of 33 administrators only one was black in a college of over 40% black enrollment. We also discovered that many instructors of our college had been removed from other colleges due to being incompetent. That spring we joined our more established scholarly comrades at more reputable institutions in the spring rite of a building takeover. It lasted one day and all our demands were met and we celebrated in a feast paid for by the college. The manipulative administrators were removed, a black studies program was implemented, needed safety procedures were installed and most importantly the students got a lesson in grass-roots organizing they would never forget. Mark Rudd, who became a leader in Weather Underground, told me that what I had done was going to be a model for working class organizing.

So in one short season, I helped lead a building takeover, I told my draft board to fuck off, was kicked out of SDS and YAF for being an anarchist, broke up the conservative movement, went to Woodstock and lost my virginity. It is too bad I never could find a way to get academic credit for it. I never told HUAC about my libertarian activities and as far as I know no one got in trouble because of my spying, except for my HUAC handler.

People have asked me what kind of information was the government looking for? My handler an ex-communist always asked me who was calling himself a communist. I told them since the government was calling them communists they were calling themselves communists as a badge of honor. If the government were to call them giraffes, they would call themselves giraffes. And why not? They were certainly sticking their necks out.

Before the split in YAF was the split in SDS. While attending the final SDS convention and bringing back armfuls of radical verbiage I asked my handler what he thought was most important. He said that that the resolution calling for legalization of marijuana was noteworthy. I said nothing because I had a few months before had introduced such a resolution to a NJ YAF convention and felt that we had new ways of deciding things in smoke filled rooms. He then told me that the most subversive document that I had retrieved was not anything that called for support for the Viet Cong, calls for civil disobedience or even for a revolution; the most revealing of radical perfidy was a pamphlet called "The Myth of Vaginal Orgasm". He also wanted me to get more copies for the Chicago Red Squad (perhaps for nighttime reading?). He then told me it showed that the then budding women's movement was nothing more than a bunch of lesbians who wanted to take over "our" women. Again, I became tongue tied as this showed the sexism of those who would not use oral persuasion or use a hands on approach to the opportunities offered by working with the women's movement. Male chauvinism is the product of the bureaucratic mind, which relies purely on a staff approach that pushes people's buttons, rather than a personal dialogue to meet the needs among those involved. I would give this same advice for romantic involvements as well.

Male chauvinism was rampant in the New Left as well. In an old arena used for wrestling matches was the aptly chosen site for the 1969 SDS convention. There a Black Panther speaker commented that the correct position for women in the movement was prone. Many SDSers loudly objected perhaps implying that a face-to-face stance is what was needed. "Fight male chauvinism" yelled the Progressive Labor Party faction (Stalinist) faction. "Fight white racism" stormed the incipient Weather faction (stalinoid). Talk about radical one-up-manship (one-up-womanship?). Later when SDS finally split the stalinoids left chanting;"Power to the People!" The Stalinists responded by chanting "Power to the Workers! I had wisely retreated to the balcony joining the anarchists, the Bavarian Illuminati and the Justified Ancients of Mummu in chanting "Lets Go Mets!" Its not that I am a baseball fan but if I am forced to make such decisions I may as well back a winner.

Another government investigator complained how difficult it was to infiltrate the new radical youth groups would since they were so spontaneous. This was in contrast to the Communist Party, which had a more conservative style and wardrobe and could be relied upon to follow Moscow. This confounded him and perhaps this why that I later discovered that he was a major investigator of the Watergate affair. There is a lesson here somewhere.

A note here about what I am communicating. Some may wonder that here is a person who is giving an account of a very formative time of our history, making strategic observations and suggestions and is going to prison and yet is making jokes about it. Why?

I believe that to understand what we were going through is to be aware that libertarianism is in sense dialectic, an ironic paradox of left and right. It is also an important observation of the time that the personal is political. Sex and political power has always been a good subject for humor. Humor lightens the subject and what we are subject to. Humor also untangles the nots of the human condition. An oh-pun mind shows the connections of what is usually missed. It also deflates egotism in a less confrontational way. It also makes what I do more fun and therefore I can more creative and avoid burnout and fear.

Humor is a tool of understanding; a weapon against evil and stupidity as well as a healing of the soul and it does all this at the same time. It is tragedy turned inside out. It is a powerful magickal tool and an art form. Getting the joke is the first step to awareness of the problem.

The next day I went to the rump caucus meeting that later became the Weatherman faction. They were putting together a manifesto that declared that everything that an American owned was the product of imperialism and that there was no hope for revolution in white America. The only thing that they thought that could be accomplished was to disrupt the US so that the third world could achieve independence. The term Weatherman did not come from the term "whether man or beast" but rather from a lyric from a Bob Dylan song "You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows" in a reference that one does not need a crazy ideology to do crazy things like bomb-throwing and sloganeering. We met in a church that had posted on its front an appropriate verse for the day. "There are ways like unto a man and these are the ways of Death". Depressed on how things were going I then volunteered to help defend the National Office from a possible takeover by the PL (stalinist) faction. I arrived to find people cowering, peering from under a window, and holding clubs to defend a ratty old office. Things were going from bad to verse as the following running doggerel from pagan left-anarchist filksinger Leslie Fish writes:

Praise Mao from whom quotations flow Break windows where ere you go Let rhythmic chants all thoughts resist Just shout "Right On" and raise your fist! (Amen)

Leslie Fish has won awards for her songs at Science Fiction conventions and her songs are available on line. More on her later.

The best criticism of the Left does not come from the Right but from leftists or former leftists and the most incisive comes from anarchists. As Roy Childs once pointed out socialists are notoriously concrete bound. The Weathermen recognizing and rebelling against this spent a lot of energy blowing up a lot of it. The best example of socialism's being concrete bound is the Berlin Wall. PL and the Weatherman soon disappeared. Good-bye to a bunch of mortar forkers.

How did SDS become so powerful and important? In addition, how did it get so crazy? SDS was the last (or next to last) hurrah for socialism. Socialism reached its peak in the US in 1912 when they got 6% of the vote. In the 1930's there was another though smaller wave fueled by the rise of fascism and the Depression. After another lull came the next, even smaller wave of the 60's. SDS started as reformist organization that became radicalized as the Vietnamese war and the resultant draft calls grew, as well as the growing awareness of how blacks, women and students were treated as second-class citizens.

Carl Oglesby, former president of SDS, noted in his book "Containment and Change": "In a strong sense the New Left and the Old Right are morally and politically co-ordinate" and that it would be a wonderful thing if they could work together. He also noticed that if they did not the New Left would be lost in debates about technocracy and Stalin and the Old Right could be hypnotized by the clanking chains of the imperial state. Carl has addressed LP conventions and still regards himself as a libertarian.

Mario Savio was a leader of the Free Speech Movement at Berkeley, which had a strike in protest against the restrictions of the literature tables. This protest is regarded as the first protest of the New Left. In his book "New Politics" he wrote "Many Americans who voted for Barry Goldwater …are justifiably concerned that our traditional liberties have been much eroded by the unwarranted growth of the federal government especially of the executive branch at the expense of the other branches. As a democrat I cannot help feeling the same concern. These libertarian conservatives see all too clearly an evil which those on the left very fail to take adequate note of. We may still win some of the conservatives to the task of building a democratic society, as well as others whom we might never have thought of as allies, if we be willing to meet our fellow citizens half way, by showing how the ideals they cherish, if consistently pursued, lead to the society we want. This is not opportunistic, but honest."

Most of this growing awareness of the American Leviathan could only find at that time a Marxist analysis that could give them an organized perspective. Like other organizations that proceeded godsless communists, who had no spirituality or sense of individual human worth, infiltrated it. Initially SDS had a requirement that no one who desired a dictatorship should be admitted but when that requirement was repealed the red rot began. To give an idea on how important SDS was Esquire magazine published an article on the SDS split with a chart showing resulting factions.

Recently, I attended the largest annual leftist gathering, the Socialist Scholars conference, even though it is an election year with an unpopular war attendance continues downward. The reason, I believe, is that people who in previous years would become Marxist are now finding more libertarian ways.

Let me tell you of one more wonderful weird story of that time. Just after I had first met Karl Hess and Murray Rothbard, I was invited to join them in Rothbard's famous living room where I met some of the leading lights of early libertarianism; Joe Peden, Leonard Liggio, Roy Childs, Jerome Tuccille and Walter Block and others. Remember that at this time that I was a spy for HUAC and these gentlemen did not know that and assumed that I was a typical New Leftist. "So we hear that you are a member of SDS, Don? Chirped Murray approvingly. "Off the pigs" said Walter, encouragingly. I then visibly winced. I had heard too much of this rhetoric before and was surprised to hear it here. Murray noticed my discomfort and said; "Don't say that, Don might think we're cops". "We are going to have an experiment and Don; you are going to be the first guinea pig. We are going to try to convert you to free-market anarchism." Murray and the others then explained how a commune might trade hand made sandals for homegrown rice and how money would evolve and the resultant evolution of markets. Needless to say, they were quite successful but I sure wished that they had proceeded from a different direction. I decided at that point to reveal that I had some knowledge of what they were saying without disclosing who I was. "You know, this sounds an awfully lot like Ayn Rand"; said I thinking that my comment would be received positively. "That right-wing bitch, forget her" yelled Murray, greatly revising my image of Rand as the radical for capitalism. Fast forward, a few months and I am at the 1969 SDS convention, still a spy, unknown to those around me. Who were these people? Liberators, malcontents or the next set of tyrants? I approached this woman dressed all in black, Leslie Fish, a left anarchist who was also at the time I later found, a member of the Benjamin Tucker up against the wall mother fucker chapter of Young Americans for Freedom as well as an SDS leader who helped lead a takeover at UofM Ann Arbor. I asked her:"What book was it that radicalized you? "Atlas Shrugged" she replied. I immediately did a triple mental back flip and told her"But I have heard from the highest authority that this is a right -wing book!" She then explained that Atlas Shrugged was a story of a technocratic revolution in which the pigs get definitely offed. "You know, I never thought of it that way before" and I realized that at that moment Rothbard master of libertarian revisionism had just met his match. 1969 was a strange time - a man had landed on the moon and the Mets won a pennant. A great time for the birth of an unlikely new movement.

In 1970, I had a show on WBAI called "The Left and Right of Anarchy". I participated in anti war events and the McGovern campaign. (Yes, I did write in John Hospers.) I was also involved in the Radical Libertarian Alliance. Our slogan was; "War is murder, taxation is theft, the draft is slavery and government is chaos!" We took an extremely left/libertarian approach to stop our new movement from drifting rightward as well as to make inroads on the left. We had a magazine called Outlook. One of the editors, Louis Rossetto went on to become the founder and publisher of the cyber culture magazine; Wired. I also spent time feeding homeless people with a group called "Everything for Everybody".

' From 1973 till about 1984 I worked almost continuously on ballot drives for the Libertarian Party, collecting over 1000 signatures a week (500 in one day is my record). I also helped in campus organizing and ran for office. In NJ, I was given a life membership because I had gotten over 300 signatures to put us over the top on the last day.

I organized the first libertarian anti-tax protest with guerilla theatre at the Federal Building in NYC in 1972. I also helped in organizing and filming anti-state income tax protests in New Jersey, including one over 10,000 people in 1976. I believe that taxpayer organizing will be to the libertarian movement what union organizing was to the left. The difference is that our efforts will result in an immediate profit for the population involved. With union organizing this is not necessarily the case. It is interesting to note that in the past few years that there have been 3 statewide tax revolts (Alabama, Tennessee, and Nevada) all of them against Republican governors.

In 1987, I was arrested for sale of LSD and later that year, while on bail organized "An Evening with Karl Hess and Robert Anton Wilson." for the 1987 Libertarian Party convention. While in prison, through the help of my attorney I got the LP to accept my idea of a roast for Karl Hess. We almost had Barry Goldwater attending, but he had to decline for health reasons. I received a copy of correspondence with him while in jail and was out in weeks in time to watch the fall of the Berlin Wall on TV and to roast Karl at the 1989 LP convention.

I have tabled and organized panels at the Socialist Scholars Conference where I had an Operation Politically Homeless table. I did something new in asking participants to choose a color dot that stood for their chosen ideology; red for Marxist, yellow for social democrat, green for green and blue for other. What resulted was a left crescent with over half scoring in the top half but no color pattern otherwise. That was a friendlier reaction than I anticipated and everyone liked the FIJA brochures.

I organized a panel on Employee-owned Stock Ownership Plans all composed of leftists who were helping unions buy out their company. A Professor Blasi who chaired the panel designed a union takeover of a steel firm that did $700,000,000 a year He was appointed by the new union owners to be on the board of directors. Another was helping privatize companies in Yugoslavia. There was another who followed the path of union organizer to investment banker to help unions. Craig Livingston, who I had met as a radical law student in the 60's, now a labor lawyer who had been involved in ESOP contracts. Any leftist who owns equity is partway there to libertarianism. At this time there are probably more industrial workers involved in ESOPs than labor unions Some of the US's largest corporations are ESOPs. If ESOPs and socially aware investment funds controlled the largest firms then opposition to deregulation, privatization and lowering high taxes would greatly diminish.

I am not completely "left brained". I have been a delegate to the American Independent Party and Populist Party conventions to see what was going on and again find out that here too was a group in decline. Perhaps as a result of my past I like to blend in so that I can get to hear what these people really think of the issues and the participants (especially us) as well as drop in a few libertarian asides. I even attended a Christian Coalition conference and was pleasantly surprised to find out that there were other libertarians there, even on the panels. No, I did not get into any discussion of my version of the "old-time religion".

I have recently become involved with the Unitarian-Universalist Church. Here I have suggested that The UU organize investment forums with representatives of socially aware investment funds to help firms that are making innovative strides in environmental protection, minority and women's hiring and advancement and various community projects. Social Security privatization will advance more quickly if these funds will see themselves as competing with SS. Since there are so many libertarians involved in the investment field this seems like an obvious, fruitful alliance.

I believe that we are evolving from a ritually dead society. People are now composing their own coming of age, marriage and memorial ceremonies for their loved ones, rather than just leaving it to established ritual. People designing Earth Day ceremonies, openings and seasonal events are looking back into folklore and even pagan ceremony for ideas and these are becoming works of art. In order to preserve and communicate these resurgent art forms I have suggested to the Unitarians that they help establish a video library of great rituals, available on line, open to all faiths.

I have also suggested that the UU organize arts events such as film festivals, where movies that have a spiritual impact would be shown and discussed by panels composed of experts on film as well as those who have an understanding of spirituality and social change. The resultant panels and Q 'and A's could be released as a companion DVD to such films as "The Mission", "Princess Mononoke", "The Passion" and "At Play in the Fields of the Lord" I think that the coming together of art, spirituality and social change is the crux, the fulcrum for any movement. The most successful political events that I have attended are usually the most theatrical, with a lot of grassroots input. Probably the greatest reason for Hitler's rise to power is his dramatic instincts honed by his early years as an artist. How else can such evil flourish? I attend pagan festivals, Rainbow gatherings and Burning Man to help create a dynamic, libertarian multi-culture. Building this culture is beyond any groups' scope; it is our responsibility to nourish and protect it from authoritarian depredations. I would gladly appreciate correspondence on any subject raised here.

You might wonder why I took so long to write this story. I had to figure out whether what happened to me in the 60's was a freakish event or part of a pattern. I have concluded that I am part of a pattern of freakish events. Not knowing the open- endedness of what I do and joking about it helps that it keeps my ego from interfering and gives me fool for the fire. Government is so boring and authoritarian that it is anti-magick. The gods love heroes; they also enjoy a good laugh. I also believe that irony is a magnet of paradoxical truth or dialectic. Libertarianism's birth reflects this as in Robert Anton Wilson's novels. You can be proud of being part of the strongest, most rational most pro-freedom movement in the country. What I am saying is that in order to defeat the enemy you have to operate outside of his field of reference. Therefore, when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

You who have worked so hard and so long for liberty - I salute you. We are part of a growing revolution that is not just political; it is economic, technological, cultural and spiritual. You might not agree with all of it- who can? It is beyond dialectic-it is multi-lectic. Libertarianism is a creative adventure capitalism, a prophet (profit) making endeavor. We are also among the leaders in science fiction, life extension, software and investing because we have a vision that is so open-ended that all can participate. I call it a bazaar enritual. Social change and spirituality is theatre and may the best showmen or shamen win.

Any correspondence will be acknowledged with a lapel pin that I designed. It is a miniature reproduction of the American Revolutionary flag, known as the Gadsden flag which is yellow with the coiled serpent and the logo "Don't Tread On Me". Letters asking for clemency on my behalf can be sent to my attorney Steve Patrizio in Philadelphia. Call the office in Philadelphia at 215-569-2042 to send a fax. Call 215-569-2121 for e-mail instructions and other questions. Remember that because of my ecstasy bust that I am a prophet without honor in my home country because I brought down the tablets from on high. I really need you to send a letter of clemency to the judge, letters of personal support, employment offers, constructive comments about this message and discussions of strategy. Write to:

I look forward to do more writing on this and other subjects. I hope that when my legal troubles are over that some libertarian organization will offer me employment.

If you would like to help the movement or me further: please consider these additional projects:

(1) I have always considered markets to be an aesthetic as well as a democratic community experience. How about a coffee table book called "Portraits of the Market" containing paintings and or pictures of markets? I can see pictures of flea markets to stock exchanges with interesting anecdotes, history and shopping advice. Throw in some libertarian commentary on how markets are the basis of a free society (Murray Rothbard told me that the Renaissance began as a result of the medieval fairs). Freedom comes from mall beginnings. The art could be shown at a libertarian think tank or conference. It is interesting to note that the goddess of the marketplace or Agora was Themas, the blindfolded Goddess of justice holding the scales. The agora was the meeting place for Athenian democracy.

(2) I organized the first auction of libertariana at the 1989 LP convention. I can get my hands on 3 ft tall copy of the Statue of Liberty (one of my favorite goddesses). This was made from materials taken away from the original during its refurbishing for its centenary I also can get an original firemark from a private fire company in Philadelphia. This firemark is identical to the one that still stands on Independence Hall. I can also procure autographs and first editions of great libertarians from Jefferson to Rand. I was once shown a specially made screenplay of "The Fountainhead" for Ayn Rand autographed by the cast. Perhaps this could become a miraculous relic. People would come to venerate it had become even more rational and increase their vision. Of course, the only way it would work is that one would have to have no faith.

(3) For the Fiftieth Anniversary Conference of the Discovery of LSD I suggested to organizer Rick Doblin, head of MAPS of having an art show where there would be an adjoining piece of paper accompanying the art so that people could bid without all being present at once. Not only did we raise money but also those who attended including media became more impressed with the psychedelic's community's creativity. The idea of a commemorative blotter was not accepted for legal reasons.

(4) Another idea that Rick used was that on the first night of the conference was a fund raising cocktail reception at which all the speakers were available for private questioning. The idea is that at any conference there are many people who like to get into an extended dialogue with a speaker. This is not a good thing to do at a Q&A session, due to a questioner might have private concerns or things to say that might not interest the audience at large. However, there are those who might attend a conference for just such an opportunity, so the best way to handle this is to charge for it by having a $50-100 admission to an event where one can do this. It is also a good opportunity to identify potential donors.

(5) How about a trade-show for ideas? I am rather nonplussed to say that the idea for a trade show for those involved in social change came to me from the Socialist Scholars Conference. These guys have put together the largest and most varied market of ideas that I have seen since the campus quads of the 60's. I think it is a rule of political organizing that one is only as strong as how many people you can work with without losing your principles. Yes, there are many political groups and individuals that I find so obnoxious that I wouldn't give them instructions on how to get their head out of their ass. Still people do like to come to the zoo. Experience here can lead to better circus-tances.

(6) I gave this idea to the Fully Informed Jury Association. It's a fund-raiser and gets your point across to a very important market. Put your candidacy or message on hemp rolling papers. If you don't mention the word marijuana, it is not considered paraphernalia. Check with a good civil liberties attorney. For good measure add something about jury nullification on the package so that you could enter info on jury nullification in your defense at the trial.

(7) I hope that someone is maintaining a tape library (hopefully on-line) of all the wonderful conferences and talks by libertarians. It might be a nice mail order business. If you have cable access station in your town, why not have a regular show of great talks on liberty. Make sure that there is an e-mail address and a phone number with people standing by so that people can have their questions met quickly while their enthusiasm is still hot.

(8)Let us promote the idea that it would be great if the Democrats were replaced by the Greens and the Libertarians replaced the Republicans. Face it, if Nader is not going to be invited to the debates then neither will we. Third parties have been responsible for almost all new ideas adopted by the R's and D's. R's and D's could be invited but they would not attend. To force our way in by lawsuit is to lay siege on a fortress that is empty.

To inform people of this fact we should negotiate with the Greens to have a series of debates on college campuses, large auditoriums hosted by the hip, smaller media or even larger media, if it catches on. These could be alternative newsweeklies, a widely trafficked web site, a friendly talk show host on radio, college radio and TV, PBS, a cable news channel, Rolling Stone or National Public Radio. Nader, because he got more votes than the LP last time, might be resistant. Since he is under a lot of pressure not to attack Kerry, we could attack Kerry in the debate while he attacks Bush. Alternatively, if the media wants more interplay with Nader and us we could do that too. If this might seem like professional wrestling rather than politics, consider. A professional wrestler was elected governor of Minnesota; thereby showing us Jesse Venture Capitalism.

The important idea is that the public would rather hear new, visionary, contrasting ideas than a sole diatribe, therefore by working together to meet this demand we will get more coverage than if we work separately. There could be separate debates devoted to topics such as foreign policy, the drug war or the environment. There could even be debates by audiences such as conservatives, gays or unions.

There is another very important reason to do this; I would rather see the supposed Left/Right dialogue be represented by the most libertarian of the contenders. In Russia there is a sad synthesis of the red-brown leftovers of the 30's. Republicans define the Democrats as their only serious, opposition. Let us recognize the Greens as our honorable opposition. This way we can have a positive dialectic and raise the level of debate. Neither of us have all the pieces of the puzzle but between us I would say that we have most of it. This is not a call for an amalgamation of our movements but rather a constructive engagement that would bring about much publicity and some powerful single-issue coalitions. State and local contests can also use this debate approach. Many Greens that I have talked to at their 2002 convention liked this idea.

I have even more ideas but let us see some response.

Don is a single straight pagan in the Unitarian Universalist church. While he has witnessed a lot of drug use, he has confined his use and sales to pot and psychedelics. He explains this as a karmic connection that he feels in that if a seller knowingly sells something bad it comes back as well as a piece of whatever good that comes out returns as well. He has never had a drug problem, except for sugar, the true gateway drug. Sugar can cause drowsiness at inappropriate times and can incite anger, not a good thing for activists. He has asthma and is diabetic. His blood sugar is under control and does not need insulin. He is under care by a natural physician who was personally recommended to him by Gary Null. His nutritional supplement bill runs to several hundred dollars a month. He is very concerned about the threat of S.722 and the Codex Alimentarius to our right to buy supplements. The alternative health community should be high on our list of marketing opportunities.

He is currently under house arrest and must wear an electronic monitoring bracelet. It is rumored that these bracelets may soon be available to the public with bands designed by Swatch. He currently lives in Hoboken and was once involved in a coalition as an opposition research and volunteer co-coordinator that elected the eccentric, Adlai Stevenson Democrat, atheist Tom Vezzetti as mayor. This man was described in the NY Daily News as the wackiest Mayor in America. (Circa 1985). Vezzetti had put together a coalition of Yuppies, Italian working class people, bohemians, Hispanics, blacks, Republicans and Democrats to oust a machine politician who had been there for many years.

During the 80's I worked with a group of artist/activists called Art for the People. They were trying to organize support for a new holiday to be held on the first Friday in August called Universal Peace Day to commemorate the end of WWII and the (hopefully) last use of nuclear weapons. I gave them the idea of organizing an event that would lovingly mimic with tongue in cheek, the 1950's coffee house scene complete with bongos, poetry and jazz. I supplied the star Robert Anton Wilson. I also gave them the idea of organizing a salons; parties of innovators in their field where they could network and cross-fertilize their ideas. These parties had works of art, dancers, musicians and donated food and music by friendly merchants. By charging admission and auctioning art we raised funds for larger events where we had big name stars such as Paul Stookey of Peter, Paul and Mary at open-air free events in Central Park in NYC. The idea is that you can raise funds by raising fun. Salons were greatly responsible for the advance of the Enlightenment.

In 1993, I had the inspiration and helped organize a ritual to help recharge the Goddess who stood at the center of power in Washington, DC. On top of the Capitol Dome stands a Goddess who was suffering terrible decay. Considering all the fetid hot air arising around her it was obvious, she needed renewal. When she was taken down for refurbishing, we held a ritual to recharge her. Unbeknownst to us, at the same time in a different part of the Capitol building the Masonic Order dressed also in ritual garb did a ceremonial relaying of the cornerstone. Scoffers may call it a coincidence, I call it a coincide-dance. As above, so below.

In Nashville, Tennessee, there stands a full-size replica of the Parthenon with a 42 ft statue of the Goddess Athena inside. I made a pilgrimage there and was told by Her that she wanted a celebration honoring her. Athena is the goddess of reason, justice and victory as well as the deity who presided over the Golden Age of Greece. I arranged with the Church of All Worlds (the name comes form the church in Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land) to rent the Parthenon for an evening and to revive the Panathenia, a festival honoring Athenia after a 1600-year hiatus. As in the original, we honored her with athletic contests, seminars, music, dance, dramatic readings and a Greek feast all in costume, which we videotaped and is available for $30. It got a good review in Gnosis magazine. I have also participated in ceremonies honoring the Ancient Ones in old temples some thousands of years old in Luxor, Egypt as well as in Angkor Wat, Cambodia; Pattani, Thailand; Mexico City, Mexico; and in Bali, Indonesia.

Copyright © 2006 Donald Meinshausen

I deeply regret that the above text the author had submitted to me on January 29, 2005, is put online so late. I could not explain the delay without writing my own autobiography for the last couple of years at least. The appeal is partly still valid or topical, though Don is now in prison. He was sentenced to 46 months and was incarcerated in late June of 2005. He is at Ft. Dix.*

In this autobiography of Don, for which I chose the alternate title "The State Breaks Down My Door" he had suggested, instead of the now a bit obsolete one "A Founder of the Libertarian Movement Is Going to Prison and Needs Your Help" (as to be going to it is not the same as to be in it), he recalls the birth of the libertarian movement and all the hell-raising it entailed. It is an invaluable document.

Two parts of this memoir had previously been published separately in the renowned "Liberty" magazine, in its issue of June 2004 (Volume 18, Number 6). So the text on this page is an expanded, updated and rearranged version of the following two texts:

• Present at the Creation

  Introduced as "Read about famous people who shared Don's peace pipe!" and "1969 was a strange time — a man had landed on the moon, and the Mets won a pennant. A great time for the birth of a new political movement."
  
  

• Famous People I Smoked Pot With

  Introduced as "Read more about sex, drugs, and libertarianism!"...

Don has, to name a few, written for Reason, Liberty for All and Rational Review. As these sites do not offer full archives like other ones or mine, and the Internet Archive not being complete either, it is difficult to come by some of Don's texts. May I therefore draw your kind attention to the following three?

• The Ganesha Project

  This is one of his favourite projects, very close to his heart.




• Bush – A Cottonmouth That Attacks Liberty

  A great piece on my site (in "CB's fireplace").




• Lockdown!

  A recent glimpse from prison (July 31, 2006).